I have a better first blog post coming but I wanted to get this up and running since a major part of this blog is going to be a focus on health-care and my current health situation. I wanted to get some background going on that and discuss how far the journey is currently and the next phases. More backstory will be coming in the actual first post but this is kind of a nice little introduction.
My period has never been normal. I got my period when I was 14 and it would skip months at a time. When you’re 14, this is amazing! However, probably something you should voice to people sooner rather than later. Plus people had assured me that in the beginning it could be like that, it was normal. I want to be very clear, this is not normal. When I would get it, it would be super heavy and last about 10 days and there would be about 2 days where it was absolutely miserable. But hating doctors, I would push through and kept believing the “it’s normal!” saying people kept telling me.
I also want to state right here, I have always been plus sized. Not that it should be such an “important” factor concerning my period but…there it is before anyone says anything. As if I couldn’t see it.
Around age 22, I got my period for a month straight. I started chalking it up to stress of finals and a really bad year but as the month wore on, I had to admit that it wasn’t normal. I started getting really weak and sick. This was the beginning. I went to the doctor and they put me on high blood pressure medication and gave me a depo shot and said I’d be fixed. It got worse. I got sicker. I went back in and they changed the blood pressure medication, gave me another depo shot, and told me to see what happened. I passed out in my shower, violently threw up, and at this point I was rapidly losing weight. (The doctor’s applauded me on this one) I went back in and they did an ultra-sound and found…NOTHING. They wrote me a prescription for a birth control pill with hormones and told me to keep taking the blood pressure medication. The period did finally get under control with the pills but the blood pressure medication kept making me sick so I stopped.
I went 10 years on birth control and regular periods. Birth control pills really helped. I want to break right here and thank Family Planning for helping me. Yes, it was a doctor at the clinic who started me on the pill but it was the doctor at Family Planning who listened to me, heard me, and explained things to me. It was this doctor who explained why my period might be behaving this way. Who talked to me about the realities of being infertile. Who told me if medication is making me sick, to speak to a primary doctor about other possibilities. I took this as stopping but…you know.
Until, well until my period started getting longer again and I lost health insurance. I decided to go off the pill and see if I would still be mostly regular. And in the beginning, I was. But then longer periods came back. Terrible pain. Heavy flow. But it was COVID. Maybe it was after effects from having COVID. Maybe it was stress. Maybe it was the weight I put on since 2020. (70 pounds. I understand this affects my health and I want to lose it and it will probably be documented here as well but back to periods because I am being just like the doctors by writing my symptoms off due to weight).
Then I started skipping again. I knew from my history I should do something but having had a couple of terrible job experiences and being at a new job, I told myself to wait. And I kept waiting. It’s been 3 months at this point of bleeding. The pain is usually nearly unbearable. The flow is Niagara Falls. I have risked my job having to call out due to it all. It’s been a nightmare. So I made a Doctor on Demand appointment about a month into bleeding to get some birth control and see what is going on. She recommended an OBGYN. I explained my situation to them and they scheduled me for a month out. And I realize I live in a large city and other people need OBGYN’s as well but given the severity I described, you’d think I’d be seen earlier. It actually got so bad I was often crying and one night I nearly went to the ER.
The day of the appointment came. We discussed PCOS. And she immediately went to high blood pressure and my weight. We did blood work and her solution was for me to see a primary doctor about blood pressure, thyroid, and pre-diabetes. And I want to be very transparent here, yes my blood work showed heighted thyroid issues. But I am not in pre-diabetes range and I have very extreme anxiety. It felt dismissive. She did put me on Provera and iron pills because I should stop bleeding and my iron is entirely depleted. She scheduled me an ultra-sound for 10 days later and sent me on my way. 10 days later. For an ultra-sound. Even though I was very clear how severe everything has been.
About 5 days into this, every time I took the iron pill my flow got heavier. My period still hasn’t remotely stopped. I called and it was written off. Some days are better pain wise and some are worse. Pretty sure my job is tired of me. I’m tired of my uterus. And now I have my ultra-sound in the morning. And while I feel there has to be something in there to finally show them how serious this is and get me my hysterectomy, I am also very aware I will be written off again or nothing will show because I am still bleeding. And that scares me because I don’t know how much longer I can keep living like this.
I am sorry this is so quickly done but I wanted to get this started and give a backstory to what tomorrow might bring. A real first post is coming with more information and I will update when I know what comes from my ultra-sound. Looking forward to all I might do with this space.
brandi and tea 